Tips Guides

How do we view the world of bondage sex today? In the minds of many for a long time viewed as an extreme sub culture of dungeons and pain. It is easy to envision a dominatrix disciplining or dog walking her subject in a dark room full of gadgets and contraptions. This may hold true for those who practice sadomasochism (S&M)/bondage as a lifestyle or profession but in this day we are all exposed to bondage one way or another.

Bondage has become openly available in virtually every aspect of entertainment from our most regarded icons by way of fashion magazine ads, billboards, to even our favorite TV shows hinting at the thrills of bondage. It would be hard not to notice. With the open expression of the bondage world today it can even be said to be in style. For many of us it has become very easy to identify with these types of publications due to the already existing nature within. Subconsciously knowing that it is taboo is what silently propels the power of excitement in this fantasy world.

In 1990 Kinsey institute reported that researchers stated an estimated five percent to ten percent of Americans practice S&M or Bondage. Also in speaking with a variety of people on the subject many have expressed the urge to play teacher/pupil or master/slaves roles with each other.

Whether we realize it or not there is an element of domination or submission in almost every sexual encounter. The bondage experience is about a give and take role play with your partner. To submit or subdue is what remains to be answered though at times it may not even be a question at all as we naturally fall into the role we urge more. With focus one may even elect to take the role opposite of your nature to add an intriguing twist. This transferring of authority is a relish of the bondage disciple. Physical restraint, punishment and rewards are attributes of bondage.

We may not have noticed in practice until now but most of us may have already ventured into the world of bondage. Bondage sex consists of authority role playing. Have you ever had blindfold sex, used bedpost restraints, or subdued your partner’s hands with handcuffs? These are all forms of bondage sex fairly common in our bedrooms. Bondage accessories simply enhance these elements further. Slip into a deeper role and show who’s in control by silencing your partners moans with a ball gag, giving the undisciplined ass a paddle spanking, or feel the pleasure of nipple clamps on your breasts as you walk the naughty on a leash & collar.

Once you are intrigued by the pleasures of bondage, forbidden fantasies and erotic role play are a common delight. Some may slightly venture into bondage sex reserving such thrills for special occasions while those who remain will have it no other way. One thing is certain a world that remained unseen and unspoken in the past has now taken a step into the light.

To help you get started in the world of bondage sex you can find tons of bondage gear and accessories in our sex toys store at My Bedroom Boutique.

Many people feel like their relationship with their partner or spouse is stuck in neutral and going nowhere fast. They think to themselves that if only their partner would work a little on the relationship, it could be much better for the both of them. But, their partner either denies that there are any relationship problems, or blames any problems there are on the other. How can a man or woman help their relationship in such a situation?

One thing that keeps couples stuck in neutral is the idea that it takes two people to improve a relationship. It is true that it takes two to have a relationship, but either damage or improvement can be done by one person. One person having an affair, gambling away the house, or constantly criticizing their partner can do dreadful damage. One person earning trust, learning to listen, or taking time to spend with their partner can do a world of good.

Another thing that keeps couples stuck is trying to determine who started the problems in the first place. It is as though if they figured that out they could somehow go back in time and stop that person from making the mistake. Or maybe it is to lay blame. The first case is not possible and the second case is not helpful.

What holds people back from making progress and achieving success in life is the avoidance of responsibility. Telling ourselves that we need more time, more money, more help, more health, more luck, etc., before we can change our life situation is what stops us. The people who have the greatest feeling of success are the ones who climb a mountain although they have no legs, start a business although they have no money, earn a degree although they have no time, or work on their relationship although they have no help. What separates these people is a do it or die attitude and taking responsibility. They do not let any condition stop them from moving toward their goal. You can be such a person. You can be the champion for your relationship and you can start today.

To get your relationship moving forward again, relationship coaches recommend the following:

BELIEVE that you can make a healthy relationship by taking appropriate action even if your partner does not want to. What you do may determine whether or not your partner takes healthy actions. Do you believe your current inactivity is helping you or your partner to take healthy action?

STOP focusing on whose fault the problems are. Whether they were your fault or someone else’s makes no difference for moving forward. Do not waste time getting your friends to agree with you about whose fault your problems are. Successful people have more skeptics and naysayers than they do supporters. Have the guts to work on getting what you want even if others do not believe you can.

SHIFT your attention from the past to the future. What do you want your relationship to be like in 6 months? In 5 years? In 20 years? Do not be limited to what you think you can achieve. Dare to dream. This is your life and you can choose how to live it. You can fail to achieve your dreams, but if you don’t dream at all, how much will you progress?

LEARN the skills that you need to get you where you want to go. People have climbed mountains with no legs, but they had to learn to walk in a different way and practice on level ground. Get help and support from people motivated to help you reach your goals. If you need professional help, get it. Make the most of your time.

BECOME a person who would be worthy of the kind of partner and relationship that you want to have. Do not expect to get Mr. or Mrs. Wonderful before you have become wonderful yourself. Could you get a great job if you were not suited for the position? How could you expect to have a great partner if you are not one yourself? Are you willing to work on becoming the kind of person who can have such a partner?

You have done well to get where you are now. To have a better life and better relationship, you must be willing to give up old strategies. To get even further, you will need to dream new dreams, learn new skills, and take new actions. There is no one stopping you but yourself.

Jack Ito PhD is a licensed psychologist and relationship coach.

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In the past, it is not that easy for one to create a wedding website. Yet it becomes very popular for couples to create a wedding website nowadays. However, do you know what the use of a wedding website is?

Before we talk about the use of a wedding website, let us discuss how you can start a wedding site. In fact, it is not difficult to do so. There are a lot of websites which will provide free domains and hosting spaces. If you do not want to spend any money on your site, you can choose to use this kind of free services. In most cases you will be allowed to upload html and php files to these sites. It will be perfect for you if you have knowledge in html and php.

There are also websites which will provide wedding websites services. These websites will also provide a range of templates for you to choose. One of the advantages of such services is that you do not need to have any knowledge on website programming in order to start your own wedding website. The templates provided are usually designed for weddings. And it will certainly be very suitable for a wedding website.

So, let us get back to the use of a wedding website. The number one usage of a wedding website is to give information about your wedding to your guests. Some of your guests may need to arrange things such as accommodations when they attend to your wedding. You can put information of accommodation and transportation in your website so that your guests can refer to it when they need the information. You may also put other information such as points f interest around your wedding location so that your guests can visit there before and after your wedding.

Besides the above stated information, you may also put some basic information of your wedding on the website. You can put your wedding date and venue etc. on the website such that you do not need to put all the details about your wedding on the wedding information. To this end you may be able to save some money on your wedding invitation since you do not need to print four to five cards. You will only need to print one card for the main invitation.

You may also share your wedding planning with people all around the world with your wedding website. In most cases your website will be open to public and everyone can access your website. This also includes other brides and grooms. You may share with them what you are currently doing. They may also be able to give you some advices. Of course you have to put some kind of contact information on the website if you would like to interact with the other couples. To this end, your website can become a great resource for other couples. It is also a good idea to share your experience so that others can learn from that. For example, they will not make the same mistake you have made if you can share your mistakes on your wedding website.

Jerry Leung has great interest Chinese Wedding Customs. He runs a website on Wedding invitations. Be sure to check Unique Wedding Favor.

I’m looking out at the rain forest that surrounds my new home. I have just moved from sea level to the rain forest at three thousand feet elevation. This is a huge change for me - and for my cat Kanui too!

On the first day of the move he stayed under the bed and only ventured out once for a few bites of food. The second day he sat on top of the bed beside me and purred. Each time he heard a strange noise his purring stopped and he looked in my direction to see my reaction. When he saw that I kept right on doing whatever I was doing in the moment- reading, typing or folding laundry - the startled look on his face relaxed and his peaceful purr resumed.

After about a week he took to resting inside the large ceramic bowl that was his favorite bed when he was a kitten. Going back to known comforts - isn’t that what we often do? Finally, a few days ago, I saw him sprawled out on the living room floor belly up, feet dangling in the air. That is when I knew he had made the transition. Kanui is getting to know his new surroundings. And so am I.

Much like my cat, I am getting oriented. And, like my cat I lost my purr for a few days. This move involved much more letting go than I originally realized! Now that I am here I can tell you that besides all of the “physical stuff” I let go of, I released some “inner stuff” that was long overdue too.

Since childhood I’ve carried around the false belief that I am responsible for what other people feel. It hasn’t been a conscious belief. I know better! But it has been a sneaky undercurrent of thinking that kept surfacing in my intimate relationships, affecting my behavior and causing me pain. Some things that worked for me at a “lower elevation” don’t thrive at the “higher altitude” I have moved to. And what a relief that is!

I can tell you I feel a renewed sense of freedom - and a new purr of contentment - as I take full responsibility for my own feelings- all of my feelings - and not anyone else’s! When others are feeling sad, or unhappy, or angry I know that is because of their own thoughts and perceptions, not because of something I did or didn’t do and definitely not because of who I am. My thoughts generate my feelings and your thoughts generate yours.

Here are a few self-empowering thoughts that are meaningful to me. They help me to feel my “inner purr” and create greater ease in all of my relationships.

I take full responsibility for my own feelings.
I am not responsible for your feelings and you are not responsible for mine.

I am free to think and feel my own thoughts and feelings regardless of what you think or feel about them.

You are free to think and feel your own thoughts and feelings regardless of what I think or feel about them.

When I take loving care of my own feelings and you take loving care of your feelings - then - we are free to share loving feelings with each other too.

Peri is the Founder of Creators Choice - Online School for Whole Life Fulfillment and supports clients worldwide to experience freedom in love and to claim their own power. Visit http://www.creatorschoice.com for free gifts to enjoy right now.

If you have found an online dating partner and have been talking via email, chat and telephone for several months, you may be ready to take things to the next level - meeting face to face.

Although meeting this person face to face may be a bit scarey, keep in mind that this isn’t going to be like meeting a perfect stranger for the first time. It will be unlike any first date that you have ever experienced.

When dating in the real brick and mortar world, you usually don’t know anything about your dating partner. You may have even gone on blind dates that were arranged for the two of you through mutual friends. Blind dates are usually very awkward affairs.

Real world blind dates are often much like those first awkward emails that you exchanged with this online dating partner who you are about to meet face to face for the first time. You knew nothing about the other person. You didn’t know what they liked or disliked. You didn’t know if they were into sports or dedicated couch potatoes. You and your blind date were both ‘flying blind’ so to speak.

Relax! This first face to face meeting isn’t going to be a thing like those awful awkward blind dates. You KNOW this person. They aren’t a stranger.

If both of you have been honest in your profiles and have posted pictures of yourselves, you should recognize each other right away. It will be more like meeting a person that you already know well - rather than like meeting a stranger.

Still, it is better to make the arrangements for this first face to face meeting to take place in a very public place. Also, the first face to face meeting will be more comfortable for both of you if you have arranged for a very short encounter - coffee rather than a meal or an entire evening.

It will be better if both of you can walk away from the first face to face meeting eagerly anticipating the next one - rather than to be stuck for several hours of awkward silence if you just don’t click.

When you meet face to face for the first time, if you find that you have been lied to in any way, stop all contact immediately. One lie is usually the precursor of many, many more. For example, if he said he was 6′11″ and is really 5′5″, or she said she weighed 120 pounds, but actually weighs 220 pounds, that isn’t a mistake - it is a bold faced lie. If they lied about that, they have most likely lied about a lot of other ‘facts’ as well.

For your very first face to face meeting, it is HIGHLY recommended that you provide yourself with a safety net. Have a friend watching from a distance or have a friend call you on your cell within a few minutes of your scheduled meeting time. This is not being distrustful. It is being cautious about your own personal safety.

Remember, all successful and long-term personal relationships are built upon truth and honesty. Trust is earned. It is not a given.

Trust your own instincts. If you feel like something isn’t quite right, it probably isn’t. This is the time to end the date. However, if you are comfortable and at ease with your online dating partner during your first face to face meeting, then there is a very good chance that this relationship will continue to develop over time.

Would you like to spice up your life, add some romance, or find your soul mate? Visit RagingHearts.com for reviews of the best online dating services. You will also find a wealth of online dating tips, self help, & relationship advice. Visit http://www.RagingHearts.com to meet the person you desire.

No one enters into marriage (or any modern variation on a long-term committed relationship) intending it to end. No one thinks that will happen to them.

Yet you’d have to be a supreme ostrich not to have some awareness of the odds of your marriage lasting ” ’til death do you part.” (I’m going to say “marriage” to save a lot of typing from here on, okay? Insert your own variation as we go along!)

So here are a few keys to increase your chances of your marriage being one of the successful ones. (You know the kind: when the press ask you on your 80th anniversary, “What’s the secret of a successful marriage?”)

Successful Marriage Key 1 - Know Your Outcome.

Ideally, you should do this before you propose or accept the proposal, but it’s never too late to change!

Ask yourself, (not your beloved - yourself!), what kind of relationship suits you.

For example, whilst equality may be one of your ideals, if you’re scrupulously honest with yourself, are you actually naturally drawn to being dominant in other areas of your life?

If you’re bossy at the office, (even if you’re not the boss), the leader and motivator of your social group, it’s unlikely you’ll be happy being a mouse at home! If that’s your personality type, for you to have a successful marriage, choose a spouse who’s happy being led by you.

On the other hand, if you’re comfortable being the deputy, and you’re a great organiser as long as someone’s told you how they want their filing cabinet sorted or their garden to look, then you don’t want a mousy partner if your marriage is to succeed.

Are you extrovert or introverted in nature? Are you optimistic or pessimistic? How resistant are you to change like moving house or career change?

Give yourself a personality workout. It’s these kind of characteristics far more than “interests in common” that make a couple compatible.

If you’re already well into a marriage by the time you read this, at least you know where to look, (inside yourself!), for where the causes of any struggle might lay. Once you get some clarity about this, have a really deep and honest conversation or ten with your spouse.

Successful Marriage Key 2 - Learn Each Other’s Language.

It has been said that only 7% of communication is verbal. The old chestnut of “my wife doesn’t understand me” - the almost cartoon excuse for an extra-marital affair - isn’t going to wash in the twenty first century.

The main reason that couples don’t understand each other is because they don’t know each other’s language. I’m not talking about what you say in words.

You each will have codes. Facial expressions, tones of voice and of course, codes of conduct. These are behaviours each of you will have grown up with. I know of at least one couple whose marriage suffered badly in the early days because whenever they argued the wife would leave the room, whilst the husband was yelling “Don’t you dare walk out on me!”

It turned out that he had grown up in a family who believed that no matter how big or bad the disagreement, you stayed until it was resolved. His wife, on the other hand, grew up in a family where it was considered the ultimate insult to dignity to be shouted at, and you simply didn’t stay in a room where that was going on.

Once they discovered this, they were able to at least come to some agreement about how to disagree!

Successful Marriage Key 3 - Dare to be honest.

It sounds simple but this can be the toughest one of all because every one of us has fears that if “you knew X about me, you wouldn’t like me.”

We all have them because no one gets through childhood without ever receiving some kind of message that parts of us are not perfect. We are reminded that it’s rude not to say thank you, impolite to belch publicly and so on.

Then there are social, moral and religious codes that we are “obliged” to follow, not to mention legal rules. Most of us, at times, walk tightropes on some of these areas of life, and a few of us have even been known to cross the odd line from time to time. (No one I know ever has, of course! But I’ve heard the rumours).

But the more you are prepared to “psychologically unpack” with your nearest and dearest, the more you’ll build up trust between you, but there’s a much more important result to this.

You’ll feel more loved, because you’ll discover that the parts of you that you yourself had thought unacceptable, even unlovable, are now accepted and cherished as part of you by the person who matters to you most.

In return, you’ll love her or him all the more for loving you.

Now who’d want to leave a marriage like that?

Trevor Emdon is a self improvement author, life coach and workshop leader. He is a trained mental health professional & NLP practitioner.

For advice, free articles and more about heartbreak recovery, visit his website www.trust-in-relationships.com